Gaurav – A teenage boy from a middle-class family lived an ordinary life. The environment at home was conducive to focus on studies, health, and character building. He always felt that something was missing in his life and felt guilty about this feeling because he felt like he was blaming his parents for not providing enough. He couldn’t figure out what was missing in his life, but deep in his heart, he knew there was something. He constantly suppressed that feeling because of the guilt. He was an average student, an obedient son and was hoping to grow up to be someone big, do something big. But he felt that he was missing his purpose. Can you relate with this?
Growing up, we all struggle to identify our purpose, our true calling. How do we find it? How do we live it?
The youth is facing a leadership crisis. They can find a lot of guidance and suggestions, but there isn’t enough care, it’s incredibly hard to find someone who can continuously be available for them and is genuinely interested in their growth.
Gaurav was going through a lot of changes in his teen years that cause confusion, anger, sadness, a constant feeling that nobody understood him. He looked around for inspiration, but was often faced with criticism, blame, and alienation. He looked to different people and groups where he would feel a sense of belonging. So many young people end-up in the wrong company just because of this urge to belong and Gaurav was at a high risk of just that.
He was torn between the two worlds. He wanted to be a good student, a good son, a decent human being, a patriotic countryman, but also wanted to have fun in life. He used to go through a lot of mood swings, He would feel a sense of deep sadness (for no apparent reason), he would be confused, had no goals of himself, he was easily influenced, hated being compared to anybody because he was constantly told that he wasn’t good enough and that he should be like somebody else. He was not thankful for anything in his life. He was not a bad person; he was just not guided, and his energy wasn’t focussed anywhere. He would cry a lot alone because he didn’t have inspiration in his life. He wanted to do something big, but he thought that he wasn’t good enough.
Unfortunately, this is the story of many youngsters around the world.
Our mentor is the answer!
Buddha said, “When student is ready, the master will appear”.
Something like this happened to Gaurav; he was not sure if he was ready, but he knew his master had appeared when he met his mentor for the first time.
When he first saw his mentor, he sensed an instant deep love! Their presence made Gaurav feel calm. His mentor said, “do something for others”. He had been so involved in his own pain that he didn’t even consider doing something for somebody, he immediately started teaching a kid whose parents were financially challenged. The change in life that the mentor brings about is permanent, and it needs constant guidance, love, and care. After joining Satsang, he slowly started seeing a change in his behaviour, he started seeing positive sides of the things. This was the first time in his life someone had truly appreciated him for who he was and not try to find faults. It doesn’t mean he didn’t have faults, but he was more confident about his strengths and was willing to get better, to change.
These are some of the biggest changes he experienced after joining Satsang.
1. Attitude of Gratitude – One of the most common experience Gaurav heard from other sadhaks (someone who seeks and commits to the mentor’s teachings) is that they felt a sense of gratitude for what they had. Does that mean that a sadhak is not ambitious? No, it means that the sadhak is driven by a sense of appreciation and not by a sense of scarcity. A sadhak works hard because they love and enjoy the work, the journey and not because they feel scarcity.
“वाह-वाह की ऐसी आदत डालें, शिकवे ना हों जीवन में”
2. Being brave – There are so many fears people go through. Fear of failure, fear of change, and fear of criticism etc. Our mentor teaches us to overcome the fears by a technique called positive thinking. Our fears usually originate in the sub-conscious mind, this part of our minds contains our deep-rooted beliefs, habit and also fears. Constant positive reinforcement (from the conscious mind) helps us overcome our fears.
Guru Bhagwan says, “Establishing ourselves in the centre of love within ourselves enables us to have more meaningful experiences, thereby creating positive memories. “Why fear when God is near”. This single positive self-talk changed Gaurav’s perspective overtime.”
3. Being in the moment – Guru Bhagwan says, “We are either angry about the past or anxious about the future; today is a gift, that’s why it’s called present” When Gaurav started focussing his energy in the present moment, he stopped worrying about the recognition or any other kind of judgement. He was able to be himself. Nobody had loved and appreciated him for himself until he met his mentor.
4. Learning attitude – Gaurav was always told to be something, do something and it did inspire him. When he joined a job, he started working very hard and started comparing his success based on the number of tasks he was doing. He didn’t see much recognition though; he was running from pillar to post to achieve the tasks, but the recognition was elusive. Guru Bhagwan pointed to him that learning is one of the most important aspects of growing. We live in an achievement-oriented world, where we track our growth based on the number of things we achieve, Guru Bhagwan suggests that we need to slow down from time to time and focus on learning.
5. Doer-ship to service – Gaurav was a good worker and would also help the family members with the chores, but he constantly looked for recognition. This need of recognition drove frustration. Guru Bhagwan asks a question about his thought process when he does something; Gaurav is very open and honest with Guru Bhagwan, he admits that he constantly asks, “what’s in it for me”. Guru Bhagwan never judges, he simply asked Gaurav to just change the question to “How can I serve”. Acts of services brought about meaning and purpose to his life and he started feeling more peaceful and content.
6. Loving people to being the Ocean of Love – In one of the very first few spiritual meetings, Guru Bhagwan said, “we are all fountain heads of Love, we are the source of all Love.” Gaurav had felt this need of being loved all his life, he would always seek approval and appreciation from others. He used to go through the ups and downs in his moods depending on other peoples’ reaction. This message from Guru Bhagwan completely changed his life and he started his quest of seeking Love within himself instead of expecting from others. As this change appeared in his life, he started offering genuine appreciation to others. He started giving what he desired the most and got the same in return.
7. Fear of God to experiencing God’s Love – Gaurav grew up in a religious family, so he used to follow the rituals and prayers. He was taught though to fear God, “Do good, be good or God will punish you” was a common statement in his family. Gaurav was very curious about this, he would ask probing questions to Guru Bhagwan with a childlike curiosity. Guru Bhagwan clarified that we are all God’s children and God loves all of us. This change in perspective from being God fearing to experiencing God’s love truly changed his perspective about the purpose of life.
Satsang is the silent influence in our life that aligns our core beliefs in order for us to lead a meaningful life. Guru Bhagwan says that the purpose of human life is bigger than just reacting to the situations or even achieving certain goals; the purpose is to find out who we are and explore our relationship with God.
Satsang isn’t a philosophical discussion, it is a practical way to live life. Guru Bhagwan’s teachings make our approach towards the day-to-day life much more positive.
When we are faced with adversities in our lives, we look inward for improvement rather than outward for blaming. That’s a big difference that Sadhaks experience in their lives.
Guru Bhagwan’s continuous guidance is the key difference in our lives before and after the Satsang. Growing up we find a lot of people to give suggestions, but it’s only Guru Bhagwan who is continuously available for regular practical guidance.
We all have a Gaurav within ourselves. Ask yourselves the changes you’d have observed in your life after Satsang.