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CIRCLE OF LOVE and CIRCLE OF FEAR

Fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of not being good enough, fear of not being loved, fear of something unknown. We all have faced these fears in our lives.

This blog is to explore and share some of our mentor’s teachings to help people to operate from a circle of love rather than a circle of fear.

Moving from circle of fear to circle of Love is about moving from “What’s in it for me” mentality to “How may I serve” state of mind. We become service oriented rather than only trying to fulfill our goals. Our mentor teaches us that our position, our status in the society, our means are all tools to serve others and not to fulfill our own agenda. This way of thinking is a paradigm shift that only a true master can bring about within us.

Our mentor offers a very simple way of analyzing what drives our life. Here it is, when we think about ourselves first, we operate from the circle of fear whereas when we think about God first, we operate from the circle of love. It may sound simple, but that’s the beauty of it. When we honestly and truthfully answer this question, we can make our journey from the circle of fear to the circle of love smooth.

Let’s discuss some examples: –

Stress during sickness

A person was diagnosed with a serious medical condition, the doctors recommended an immediate surgery otherwise there would be a risk of losing his voice. Our animal instincts force us towards the circle of fear and pushes us into a state of anger, depression, and a blaming attitude, none of these things help us in this situation. The other approach is to surrender and be in the moment. A person operating from the Circle of Love will practice samarpan (surrender) in this situation and take necessary actions in the moment. It is ok to feel fear, but when we are on the journey towards the circle of love and we commit to that journey, we are able to remind ourselves to base our thoughts and actions in Love and surrender. In the diagram below, we can see that it is not an overnight shift, it’s a journey.

We do feel some negativity in this journey because of the slimy nature of the wordly mind, but a commitment towards the journey makes us keep moving. So, it’s ok to feel fear sometimes if we keep looking and moving towards the Circle of Love.

Our mentor asks a question for us to introspect, “Who do we connect to in these difficult situations – God or the circle of fear?”.

Students and stress

The students are feeling a lot of stress now at the time of the exams. A lot of the schools have stopped exams or at least grades so that the kids don’t feel stress. Our mentor suggests something that dissolves stress at a much deeper level, the concept of Circle of Love whereby we connect with God in the moment; we realize that difficult situations are part of life and make us stronger; we develop an attitude to deal with that stress overtime by invoking Surrender to God and acting in the moment, we don’t stress over the result. Stress is either about the anticipation of the future or anger from the past.

Our mentor tells us to practice acceptance in the present moment. A student operating from the Circle of Love realizes that the only thing in his/her control is their action in the present moment, but also knows that the ultimate goal of life is to connect with God.

Our mentor changes our perspective about stress, by suggesting that it is part of the preparation, and we shouldn’t try to avoid it, instead use it to prepare better, and we can only do that if we practice samarpan.

Present fear is less than the horrible imagining.

Sachin Tendulkar felt anxiety before each game for 10-12 years of his career, but he channeled that energy to prepare mentally for the game. He would do little things like ironing his clothes, packing his kit to focus on the preparation. He considered every little thing as the preparation for the game.

True purpose of life

In the world of competition and achievement orientation, it is important to slow down from time to time and access that state of deep love where we can surrender, let go and become detached from the outcome. Even if we achieve things, the feeling of exhilaration is momentary.

Most people aren’t able to find true purpose and meaning in their lives; this is where circle of love helps. Love is the purpose and the meaning of life; it is the force that guides us and the more we are love oriented, the more peaceful we are, the more present we are, the healthier we are, and the more spiritual we are.

Creativity or Innovation

Operating from a circle of fear makes us want to control things, impacts our creativity, and makes us selfish. There is no creation in fear. We cannot create or innovate by living in fear. Creation is a process of love. We need to be free to be able to create anything and living in fear causes us to be a slave of that fear.

Innovation is about trying something new, failing at it, learning from it, and trying it again. In the social media driven world, we are becoming obsessed with portraying a successful image about ourselves for others and forgetting about the internal place where the success comes from, the circle of love.

Anticipation or acceptance

FEAR is False Evidence Appearing Real

It is our anticipation of the things that make us feel fearful. It isn’t real. Our mentor says that the definition of real is that which doesn’t change and according to this definition, the absolute truth is God alone. Fear originates from our negative perception of anything, we need to free ourselves from these perceptions and focus on the absolute truth.

Everybody feels afraid at some point in their life. It isn’t the fear itself that causes the downfall or a person, it’s the attitude towards the fear. Our mentor moves our attention from Forget Everything And Run to Face Everything And Rise. We can use our fear to be focused and introduce prayer & surrender into our life by changing our attitude towards it.

So, some simple day-to-day things that we can do to move our attention to circle of love

  1. Surrender and Prayer – Add prayer and quiet time into your daily routine to just be in silence.
  2. Appreciate – Develop an attitude of gratitude. There are so many things that are right with this world, but we have focused our attention to the wrongs for too long. Be thankful for little things in life.
  3. How can I serve – Whenever a new situation comes in life; like a project at work or a community work – ask yourself, “how may I serve”. In this achievement-oriented world, we are taught to focus on “what’s in it for me”. Just this simple question can change our perspective towards life
  4. It will come to you when you let it go. Try every day to let go of the attachment to the outcome. Results aren’t related to the desires; they are related to our attitude and our love towards the work (act of service). Focus on the attitude and the results will take care of itself.

As Bhagwan Krishna says in Bhagvad Geeta-

“कर्मण्येवाधिकारस्ते मा फलेषु कदाचन।
मा कर्मफलहेतुर्भूर्मा ते सङ्गोऽस्त्वकर्मणि॥”

  1. Be generous – Our mentor teaches us to be generous. Simple things – don’t negotiate with the vegetable hawker, rikshaw puller. Donate some portion of your salary for the benefit of humanity. Compliment and appreciate others. Act with love into your day-to-day life and you’ll see love appearing in your life more.

Guru Bhagwan ke Shukrane!!

This Post Has 8 Comments

  1. Ritu bajaj

    गुरु भगवान जी के अनंत शुक्राने है।सतगुरु हमारा भगवान की तरफ समर्पण कराके भगवान जी से प्रेम कराते है।गुरु बताते है Why fear when God is here.Curcle of love में लाते है।गुरु भगवान जी हमारे डर को भगा कर हमें प्रेममय बनाते है।प्रार्थना करना भी प्रेम की निशानी है।

  2. Ritu bajaj

    गुरु भगवान जी के अनंत शुक्राने है।सतगुरु हमारा भगवान की तरफ समर्पण कराके भगवान जी से प्रेम कराते है।गुरु बताते है Why fear when God is here.Curcle of love में लाते है।गुरु भगवान जी हमारे डर को भगा कर हमें प्रेममय बनाते है।

  3. Surinder bajaj

    सतगुरू भगवान जी आप जी के अनन्त शुक्राने है।बहुत ही अच्छी जानकारी दी है ।आप जी हमारे डर को दूर कर के भगवान की समर्पित करा रहे है और भगवान से प्रेम करना सीखा रहे हैं।हमारे अंदर के डर को खत्म कर रहे है??

  4. Bharti

    Thank you very much for this beautiful blog . Ways to shift from circle of fear to circle of love are very well explained. Samarpan, sense of service, generosity, creativity – these virtues may come in my life. This is my humble prayer in holy feets of my Guruji.

  5. Savita Churiwala

    Guru bhagwan ji ke anant shukrane hai bhut sunder article bhut clearly aap na sab bataya hai aap ki kirpa se samajh khulti hai, ?

  6. Neelam Maurya

    Wonderful article bhagwan ji. Apke anant shukrane hai bhagwan ji. As soon as we surrender to god we become free of stress and anxiety and rather than thinking whats in it for me – we should practise How may I serve makes all job easier. ?

  7. Anju Rana

    Many many thanks for sharing this article and truly said fear of anticipation is more than circle of love .
    How to increase circle of love is well explained,and surrender to the Supreme is always the ultimate.
    Bhagwan ji as a child we are always in the learning stage .Always pray to God to give me the strength to follow your teachings.
    Radhe Radhe Bhagwan ji.

  8. Anu

    Very inspiration article.
    How may I serve,samarpan,be in the moment are some ways by which we can come in circle of love.
    Shukrane bhagwan ji

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